Troy
It's such an epic that I have to spout poetry...much like how Homer was inspired...(read it aloud after consuming some alcohol...it rhymes much better with a slur, trust me!)
Brad Pitt plays Achilles
So muscular and strong
Eric Bana, the Hulk, plays Hector
Who wishes to right every wrong
Orlando Bloom loses his elf ears
But still plucks a bow so long
They got a German to play Helen
Simply cos she's blonde?
Troy's a grand movie
Except it's kinda long (2h 45 mins)
Lots of action on the screen
Hunks more droolsome than James Bond
Follow the script of Homer's Iliad
You can't really do much wrong
The mortal characters are quite complex
But the gods were not called upon
Barely a passing mention
Were Zeus, Apollo and Poseidon
Swordfights were spectacular
But the censors did not condone
Some gore, some blood, some violence
Were all but almost gone
Achille's jump attacks were so lovely
His enemies can only groan
Definitely worth a see
If epics turn you on
If not Brad Pitt will do the job
So leave the boyfriend home
Pee before you take your seat
And silence your mobile phone!
*dodges rotten eggs*
Of course we know Homer isn't the only guy who writes epic composition...his namesake, Homer Simpson has his own version: (which was circulated in email a long time ago)
Homer's Dough Ray Me
Sing to the tune of Dough Ray Me (or Doe-a-Dear as I call it!)
Dough~~~~~~~~~~~ the stuff that buys me beer
Ray~~~~~~~~~~~~~the guy who sells me beer
Me~~~~~~~~~~~~~~the guy who drinks the beer
Far~~~~~~~~~~~~~the distance to my beer
So~~~~~~~~~~~~~~i think i'll have a beer
La~~~~~~~~~~~~~~lalalalala beer
Tea~~~~~~~~~~~~~No thanks i'm drinkin beer
and that brings us back to (looks in the empty glass)Doh!!!
Maybe you should go through Homer Simpson's epic before reading my contribution above.
It's such an epic that I have to spout poetry...much like how Homer was inspired...(read it aloud after consuming some alcohol...it rhymes much better with a slur, trust me!)
Brad Pitt plays Achilles
So muscular and strong
Eric Bana, the Hulk, plays Hector
Who wishes to right every wrong
Orlando Bloom loses his elf ears
But still plucks a bow so long
They got a German to play Helen
Simply cos she's blonde?
Troy's a grand movie
Except it's kinda long (2h 45 mins)
Lots of action on the screen
Hunks more droolsome than James Bond
Follow the script of Homer's Iliad
You can't really do much wrong
The mortal characters are quite complex
But the gods were not called upon
Barely a passing mention
Were Zeus, Apollo and Poseidon
Swordfights were spectacular
But the censors did not condone
Some gore, some blood, some violence
Were all but almost gone
Achille's jump attacks were so lovely
His enemies can only groan
Definitely worth a see
If epics turn you on
If not Brad Pitt will do the job
So leave the boyfriend home
Pee before you take your seat
And silence your mobile phone!
*dodges rotten eggs*
Of course we know Homer isn't the only guy who writes epic composition...his namesake, Homer Simpson has his own version: (which was circulated in email a long time ago)
Homer's Dough Ray Me
Sing to the tune of Dough Ray Me (or Doe-a-Dear as I call it!)
Dough~~~~~~~~~~~ the stuff that buys me beer
Ray~~~~~~~~~~~~~the guy who sells me beer
Me~~~~~~~~~~~~~~the guy who drinks the beer
Far~~~~~~~~~~~~~the distance to my beer
So~~~~~~~~~~~~~~i think i'll have a beer
La~~~~~~~~~~~~~~lalalalala beer
Tea~~~~~~~~~~~~~No thanks i'm drinkin beer
and that brings us back to (looks in the empty glass)Doh!!!
Maybe you should go through Homer Simpson's epic before reading my contribution above.
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