Distraction

So what does one do to recover from heartbreak?

When your heart of glass is shattered, when you are bleeding freely from a ruptured aorta and when your auricles and ventricles are riddled with cracks, what should you do?

1. The South Park way - Become a Goth

When Wendy broke up with Stan, he joined the Goths in their ritual moody Gothic poetry writing sessions, wearing all-black apparel, drinking coffee incessantly and labelling every non-Goth "Conformist".

Hang on, I'm already doing that on a regular basis aren't I...


Thanks to South Park Studios for everything South Park!

2. The Sims way - Mope and be totally uncooperative

I HATE it when my Sims suffer a broken heart. Move on fer godsakes, go to the gym, work out, try and look attractive and stop being so unconsolable! You're not the only Sim I have to take care of!

3. The Jennifer Aniston way - Get therapy

Boy if I lost Brad Pitt I will need serious help too.

4. The Nicole Kidman way - Get botox / Turn to "sisterly" love

Nicole darling, Tom didn't dump you because you are not beautiful. He would rather have someone with an exotic Latino accent (not Australian) or who has...hmm...Katie Holmes isn't what I will classify as attractive. Anyway, Naomi Watts might turn out to be a better lover than Mr Cruz, sorry, Holmes, SORRY!, Cruise.


Thanks to ImageShack for Free Image Hosting

5. The Desperate Housewives way - Look for a cute mysterious plumber around the neighbourhood

The Teri Hatcher character is such a floozy. No way am I going to adopt this method, although I must say, Mike Delfino is pretty cute.

6. The Kill Bill way - Whack him with the Ten-point Palm Exploding Heart technique

But first, a trip to Pai Mei Sect to learn the technique. Or can I get some virtual lessons from Mortal Kombat?

7. The Fatal Attraction way - Cook the rabbit

Mmm rabbit stew. Not a bad way to recover!

Click here for a good recipe!

8. The Black Adder way - Abuse Baldrick

We all need a Baldrick in our lives, to bully, abuse and insult. Any takers?


Thanks to BBC for this Baldrick ecard!

Posted by Unknown on Sunday, August 14, 2005 at 8/14/2005 04:31:00 PM | Permalink